Girl's toys

my local Target is revamping the whole store, expanding some sections - including the toy section. so I had to check it out: what toys are available for children now?

(please excuse the shitty cell phone camera)

This giant sign over the toy section made on thing clear: Boys on this side, girls on that side. Boys want transformers, girls want princess dolls. (wait, is that even a transformer? I'm so out of touch.)

So, being a girl, and generally more concerned for what young girls are playing with because that directly affected me growing up, I decided to take a look at my old friend Barbie.

Barbie's still blonde, but her boobs are smaller, and look, she has a job! But wait... she's not a struggling teacher trying to educate the leaders of the future. No, she teaches at Princess Charm School.

What else does Barbie do in her spare time?

She does her laundry, so that her "closet will be full!"

She cooks, from dinner to dessert, a romantic meal! But wait...

Damn that pesky Ken, off doing God knows what, while Barbie's been at home slaving over this meal all day. Doesn't he understand that she keeps the household together while he's off at work?

Girls can also help Barbie "Dress-up to Makeup" to get ready for her hot dates (notice Barbie's speech bubble - "My date's at 8!")

And when Barbie isn't teaching ladies how to be ladies, filling her closet, doing her makeup, or waiting on her man, she's still in the kitchen!

But sometime she gets lazy. I'd like to add my own caption to this: "I hope Ken isn't angry that all I have for him is this frozen TV dinner again!'

But it looks to me like Ken doesn't care... he's a bit of a fashionista himself. And he <3s Paul Frank. What a man. What. A. Man. No wonder Barbie keeps the house and herself together for him!

But maybe I'm being unfair. There were several other occupations for Barbie available - Dog groomer, artist, and babysitter. Oh, and of course, Wedding Day Barbie. But what happened to the REAL teachers? The doctors? The vets? All the things Barbie used to do....

With all of our social progress, how is Barbie moving on? Remember when she broke up with Ken? What happened to THAT awesome, independent chick? Oh yeah, she got back together with him once he got his new Bieber hair and stylish new clothes.

But she's not always blonde anymore. I noticed that they've even changed the faces on their dark-skinned barbies... No longer do we have the same face for every skin tone, but ethnically diverse facial shapes, noses, etc.

Now girls can find a Barbie that looks more like them. I applaud Mattel for this.

But after observing Barbie's failures, I found some awesome new dolls that didn't exist when I was young.

MONSTER HIGH! That's the daughter of the Phantom of the Opera. They've also got Dracula's daughter, Frankenstein's daughter, daughter of the Mummy... I love this spooky concept. The dolls don't represent any specific race, and their only concern seems to be their hobbies (like Operetta's spooky guitar) and their emotions (each doll comes with a diary). Which seems like normal girl activities to me.

I know what dolls I'm getting my goddaughter. And I'm sorry, Barbie, but you and I are over.